Episode 123 Transcript

Ep 123 (00:05.02)

Well, hello, you guys. Welcome back to episode 123. Now, just remember this quote, be kind before everyone you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about. Now that saying took on a whole new meaning for me in my twenties and it stuck with me. And I was just thinking about this memory from the other day when I was dealing with, well,

 

Kind of a difficult client. mean, we have all been there, right? And I started to think about this memory to help me get through that moment. So for a couple of years in my mid twenties, I remember living in a share house back in San Diego in a suburb called Normal Heights. A share house is just, you know, a house where you're sharing it with other people.

 

We used to actually call it abnormal heights back in the day. It was a little bit seedy. I'm not going to lie. I mean, it was a bit rundown, a bit seedy. sort of had like an edgy pub across the street from my house. My house was really old. It was an interesting time in my life, but look, I enjoyed it. So I lived with my boyfriend at the time and another, another guy was there as well. And we actually.

 

really loved it because we used to run all these like low brow underground art events kind of in the area and throughout San Diego. And this house is very special because we actually had at one time a band in there, Jason Mraz, kind of like a jazzy pop band. They actually recorded their first album in my house. And yeah, it was an interesting time. Let's just say it was fun. But the guy that we were living with, my partner and I at the time,

 

he had a girlfriend that he was seen and got more and more serious. And then he invited her to live with us. And you know, you're in your mid twenties. You're like, yeah, sure. Come along for the ride more of the Marriott. I mean, yeah, it was, it was a crazy time, but it was fun. So he invites her in and. I remember meeting her and she was really quiet and quite withdrawn and timid.

 

Ep 123 (02:22.576)

She seemed really nice though, but different, know, quite different from the scene and the people that we had coming and going in our house. So one night I had this opportunity, I think it was roughly about a month after she had moved in, I had this opportunity to sit down with her and I said to her, you know, let's have dinner together. Let's hang out. Let's get to know each other. And she's like, yeah, okay, that sounds cool. And we had dinner, just the two of us. And I

 

shocked at what I was about to learn. So she told me she came from Alaska and she witnessed her parents murder by other teenagers. I mean, I thought I was suddenly stepping into some sort of horror novel when she was telling me she climbed under her bed.

 

basically these teens came into her house when she was a teen and they were there to rob the house. I think they were on drugs. I can't really remember that part of the story, but they came into her house, her childhood home, and she hid under the bed and she witnessed her parents being murdered in this robbery. Now she knew who they were. They went to her school and she then

 

went to the school to confront them sometime within that time period. And it got bad, let's just say. But that was an incredible, horrible, shocking time of her life. And I remember around that time, I was also working for Tony Robbins. So I was

 

these art, fashion and music events with my boyfriend at the time called 911 Art. That was our business. I've talked about it in previous episodes. So I was doing these events and I was kind of in that low brow, artistic, funky music scene. And then I was also working for Tony at the same time, the motivational speaker or inspirational speaker, as he says. And around that time, I remember hearing about something called the model of the world, like someone's model of the world.

 

Ep 123 (04:41.476)

It's a term that's used in NLP or neuro linguistic programming. Now the model of the world is essentially how someone interprets their world. And it's essentially a collection of beliefs and values, know, things that they've picked up and programmed their mind to be like over time. Now your model of the world would be very, very, different from my model of the world purely because we interpret things very differently. Right.

 

I grew up in California, but I've lived in Sydney for 20 years. I've had a very different upbringing probably from you. I'm the oldest of three sisters. There's many different touch points and things, whether it's our upbringing or where we were brought up or our age or demographic, there's so much, right? We're all so different. And that essentially wires us for our model of the world.

 

my model of the world cannot be more different from the upbringing of my new flatmate. Like, I was shocked, I was stunned, I didn't even know how to relate to her, but it made a lot of sense because of how she was so timid and frightened to be open to people. Because obviously she went through a terrible, terrible time. And because her story was so, so intense and horrible,

 

I will never forget that moment in time ever. And it somehow sort of linked that memory to what I was learning around the model of the world at the same time. And with that whole memory, I basically came out of that with this. Don't ever make assumptions about what someone is going through or what their past is like. Cause you really have no idea, right? How could I seriously have guessed that my new flatmate had been through this trauma?

 

So you never know. And I wanted to share this story with you because inevitably you will have a tough time with a client, a staff member, a friend, a stranger in the street, someone, right? And I want you to just remember that we were all fighting very, different battles every single day. Remember to be kind and to also not take things too personally because they are going through a battle that you know nothing about.

 

Ep 123 (07:06.628)

Yeah, I just wanted to bring that up to you because it came to me when I was dealing with a difficult situation and it reminded me to consider the person and where they came from. All right, you guys, I hope that helps with something that you might have coming up in the future. All the best. Talk to you soon. Bye